The women haters club April 23, 1985

 


 

The men in the Dunkin Donuts kitchen hate women.

This is one of the oldest hobbies in the history of the world.

Some anthropologists (none of whom have investigated this kitchen recently) claim men are jealous of women’s ability to bear children and have a more stable sex life than men.

I’m not sure men would want to bear children, but apparently impotence is modern man has become an epidemic, driving many men to take insane measures.

I don’t follow personal columns, but I know men who do, searching for perverse pleasures.

The more the men talk here the more they reveal themselves and their true desires.

Gary is the most blatant, having once been accused of rape – right here in the back of the store.

According to Gary the whole things started with an argument about who should carry a heavy bag of sugar out into the front for the women who work there.

They asked Miguel, a small Spanish man and for some reason this infuriated Gary.

“Why can’t one of those fat bitches carry it,” he complained.

His alleged victim who overheard this told Gary to “go fuck himself.”

Twice the size of Miguel, she was nearly as big as Gary, maybe even twice as tough, but she also felt affection for several of the men in the kitchen, touching them frequently, often being suggestive.

A number of the men suggested she needed affection, and being overweight she felt the need, and became extremely offended when she overheard the other men telling Gary he ought to oblige her, and Gary telling them, “Id rather fuck a horse.”

The details of what happened next become blurry and depend on who reported it. One report said she threw a knife him. Another said she tried to hit him with a rolling pin. All accounts, however, reported him grabbing her by the throat and trying to choke her, although he said he was merely trying to hold her down so she wouldn’t hurt him.

An hour later, after she stormed out of the store crying, the police showed up.

The woman had filed charges, accusing Gary of attempted rape.

Ultimately, her version of the story claims that Gary had pinned her down in the store room after a whole shift of his flirting with her.

She said he came upon her alone in the store room, lifted her up, threw her own onto sacks of flower, where he fondled her breasts and would have gone further, until she hit him and ran.

In some ways, it doesn’t matter which story is true. Gary knew her sensitivity about her weight and used it against her.

But Miguel, Robert the night finisher and others had egged him on, each having their own similar story, and justification for hating some woman for some slight, though I was never able to make sense of who hated which woman for what reason. Even the customer with slicked back hair who wonders in each Saturday night, acting all cool, sits at the counter mocking all the women who come in that he thinks of as ugly, picking on one of the counter girls as ugly, and the other as fat, getting a willing ear from Robert, who can’t get enough of the man’s hateful stories.

I suggested the men in the shop would get a lot further if they were nice to women, instead of mean.

They all looked at me, and nodded when Gary said, “Being nice don’t get you nothing but a kick in the teeth.”

 

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