Bitter Uncle Frank August 1, 1985

 

Uncle Frank is approaching the age of 50.

He talks a lot about when he was young, while fingering his new hearing aid, waiting for it to whistle the way his old one did, a whistle like a tea kettle but with an electronic edge.

It always announced that he was in a room.

His silence otherwise makes him invisible, despite his being a hulk of a man, his thick fingers reaching constantly back to his ears.

Maybe that’s the cruelest part, his silence.

He had always been a man of words, loud words, angry words, too bitter to keep contained, seeing the world as fundamentally unfair, a system working against him or any working man, telling me all too often how everything sucks, and how he ought to have become a hippie, only born too soon, to the wrong kind of parents, in a town far too conservative to put up with him as a beatnik.

Born five years later, he might have made that choice, but born and raised in the midst of The Great Depression and later The Good War, he could not turn into a Jack Kerouac or an Allen Ginsberg, Grandpa needing his massive bulk for common labor, a strong back to compensate for his own lost dreams.

A huge, bear of a man, Frank could not escape his destiny, grandpa mocking him for the guitar he kept in the corner of the dinning room, or the perpetual efforts to sketch me in the kitchen.

Ted mocked him, too, recalling Frank’s rage, and how Ted had to hit Frank on the back of the head with a baseball bat to keep him from killing a gnat of a man who had teased him.

For years, Frank loaded trucks or drove them, once even working as a classic milkman until he tried to kill the editor of local gossip sheet who had mocked him when he had been accused of rape, running a flippant headline said, “Milkman found innocent, says he was working.

Cooler heads and the bulk of his four brothers kept Frank from murder. Although to this day, he still bitterly regrets he hadn’t.

I go to his apartment and find Norman Rockwell prints posted on every wall, the way my mother has religious icons on hers, though it is an abode of a workman, not an artist, his dirty shoes lined near the door, his work clothes hanging on a hook in the corner. 

On the table are lessons for a class he’s taking on mechanical drawing, determined to get a job that doesn’t have him coming home with grease under his fingernails.

Grandpa always mocked him for this; Ted feels about the same, saying “He makes good money, why is he complaining all the time?”

Frank still believes he might have been a good artist or musician if he had been given encouragement, but also believes he might not have made a success of it.

“You need connections,” he said. “You always need connections.”

 

 

 1985 Menu


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